I had Journalism this afternoon. The trip to Melbourne Central took two and a half hours. The trip home took two hours. Ouch. The pain, however, was lessened by the Connex staff who were on duty. Did I just type something positive about Connex? Unlikely, highly unusual, but… that would be a big, resounding YES.

I got on the train at 4:00pm. It left ten minutes later, and when we pulled up at Lalor station, the driver made an announcement: “There has been a lightning strike at Clifton Hill station, and we’re expecting some delays. This train may be terminating at Bell station, where replacement bus services are being provided, but we’re hoping to push it through. Please make yourself comfortable.”

And then the all-important addendum: “We apologise for any inconvenience.”

Great, I thought to myself. Connex handles bus services more poorly than trains, if that’s even possible. The canned ‘update’ wasn’t promising, either. I figured I’d spend about three hours on the train, with maybe one or two announcements, and I’d miss my class entirely. I considered getting off the train and going home, but then the train pulled into Keon Park station (finally), and the driver made another announcement.

Less canned, more information. The signals were out, that’s why it was taking so long. Clifton Hill is where two train lines merge into one, and without signals it was a dangerous area. He thanked us for being patient, again. Warned us that we may as well get comfortable, since it was going to be a while. I stuck around. By the time we were at Reservoir, it was 4.45pm and I should have been at Flinders Street station.

Wonderful. The rest of the trip was a long, slow crawl. At Rushall, the driver stopped and said, over the loudspeaker: “If you’re a smoker, feel free to get off the train and have a cigarette - we’re going to be here for a while.” The smokers took his advice, and the train felt lighter, somehow. We weren’t being kept in the dark this time, we were being informed. It made a big difference.

We reached Clifton Hill, finally, at 5:20pm. They had the crossing blocked off with cop cars, news crews filming everything, and people in uniforms running around, trying to look official. Chaos, basically, as the cops tried to keep all of the traffic moving through safely. Just up the street from all the commotion, a kid was knelt at a garage door, spraypaint can in hand. Good old Clifton Hill.

The ride home was just as slow, since they had to stop and get written permission to move after each signal. I think the stopping and starting was particularly hard on three guys in my carriage. Two were laying on the floor, one was standing, bent over a rail. They were drunk, I think; two of them threw up, one couldn’t stop laughing, another kept groaning as if in pain. They stumbled off at Lalor.

Once again, though, the drivers kept us informed during the trip, explaining what was happening and - perhaps more importantly - why. I think it made people were more patient, and less tense. Well done, Connex: you got it right. And to the driver of the 4.11pm Flinders Street train from Epping? You were amazing. Thank you for making those two and a half hours bearable.

Total travel: Four and a half hours. The things I do for classes, seriously.

P.S - to the driver of the 6.31pm Epping train from Flinders Street: please don’t ever tell us that you’re going to try and ’sneak through’ an area without signals ‘as best as you can’. It isn’t reassuring.